The film reboot of the Fantastic Four was released this weekend and frankly… it didn’t generate a lot of positive response, critically or financially. Here at 4LN we are making a commitment to be more positive with our content and not as blatantly cruel and negative as most other nerd-culture sites. Therefore, in the interest and pursuit of finding the silver-lining, I’ve decided to use my review to talk about the finer points of Fantastic Four, and I think you’ll be surprised at how many there really are…
First off, Fantastic Four has actors! Like DOZENS of them! There’s some that are on the screen a bunch but then there are some that aren’t on the screen very much at all, but regardless of how much screen time they get, they’re there. I really like movies that have actors in them.
Also, I thought the font that they used for the end credits was REALLY cool. I think it was, like, Embrada or Highbrow, or something like that. I don’t know exactly which font it was but I know I really liked it. I don’t like fonts like Olde or Lilliput, so I’m really glad they didn’t use one of those.
Another thing that I really liked was the popcorn. I mean, I know that Fantastic Four wasn’t necessarily responsible for the making of the popcorn but had I not been going to see that steaming pile of crap (sorry, gotta be more positive…) Had I not been going to see that… movie… I wouldn’t have gotten that delicious tub of popcorn. It was so good! It had the perfect crunch and the butter was just right. I added a sprinkling of that orange popcorn-salt they have that kind of looks like it would have a cheddar flavor but it doesn’t, it’s just regular salt that’s orange for some reason. Anyway, that was a smart move on my part. It really made the popcorn flavors… well, POP! LOL! JK!
Finally, the absolute best thing about Fantastic Four… was the trailer for Black Mass that played before it. Have you see that? Holy crackers, it’s intense! It’s the true story of notorious mobster Whitey Bulger and it’s got Johnny Depp as the main man himself, Whitey Bulger, plus it has Benedict Cumberbatch (from the upcoming Doctor Strange film), Kevin Bacon, Todd from Breaking Bad, Yellowjacket, the girl from 50 Shades of Grey, that guy from The Great Gatsby (You know, the movie they made about that book you pretended to read in high school) who shot Leo DiCaprio (sorry, there should be a SPOILER ALERT before that), and most importantly… Adam Scott.
So there you have it folks. There are PLENTY of enjoyable things about the new Fantastic Four movie. Like, at least 4… FANTASTIC things. (See what I did there?) All those critics and websites that have been telling you that it has no redeeming qualities just weren’t looking hard enough. Make sure you get to the theater early for a seat, and maybe consider even grabbing your tickets on Fandango, because all showings are selling at least a handful of tickets and they’re going a slow to moderate pace!